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Everyone Is John: A Hilariously Chaotic RPG Experience

Imagine waking up in a strange apartment with no memory, only to discover a chorus of voices in your head, with each one struggling for control. That’s the premise of Everyone Is John, a fast-paced, competitive roleplaying game designed for three or more people with delightfully devious intentions. In this blog post, we’ll dive into what makes this game so memorable, how to set it up, and tips for running sessions that will have everyone laughing (and maybe cursing) in equal measure.

What Is Everyone Is John?

Everyone Is John casts all players as “Voices” in the mind of John, an otherwise blank-slate man who drifts through the city with no skills or personality of his own. Each Voice has its own agenda, abilities, and a pool of Willpower points to spend on controlling John’s actions. That bidding war drives every scene, turning simple tasks into uproarious struggles for dominance.

Game Components and Setup

Getting started takes just a few minutes and minimal supplies: paper, pencils, and a set of polyhedral or six-sided dice. You’ll also need:

• A Game Master to describe scenes and adjudicate rolls

• Willpower trackers for each Voice (coins, tokens, or even scraps of paper)

• Character sheets listing each Voice’s skills and Obsession

Begin by dealing out equal Willpower points to each Voice. Then have every player define two or three specific, testable skills, which can be anything from “Lockpicking” to “Singing” to “Running.” Finally, assign each Voice a singular Obsession, the near-impossible goal that will score points whenever John pulls it off.

Core Mechanics

Willpower

Willpower is the currency Voices use to bid for control of John. Each time the GM calls for bids, players secretly choose how many points they’re willing to spend. The highest bidder narrates John’s next actions. If a Voice ever hits zero points, they’re out of the competition.

Skills

Skills are the only nod to traditional roleplaying. They represent what John can do when a particular Voice is in charge. Skills should be things that can be tested with a roll or challenged by the GM. Creative, unexpected skills often lead to the funniest outcomes.

Obsession

Each Voice’s Obsession is its personal win condition. These should be concrete, difficult, and occasionally absurd: think “Eat a bicycle” or “Get on the news.” Track how many times each Voice makes John fulfill its Obsession. Those counts determine the winner at the end.

John

John himself is gloriously unremarkable: no memories, no strong personality, and zero direction. The fun lies in how each Voice tries to mold him. Players take turns bidding for John’s actions until either all Willpower is gone or the GM ends the session.

How to Play

1. The GM describes John waking up in a random location, starting at dawn adds extra comedic potential.

2. The GM calls for Willpower bids. Voices secretly choose points and reveal simultaneously.

3. The winning Voice narrates John’s actions until they need to roll or another Voice outbids them.

4. Repeat bidding and narration, weaving in John’s skills and driving toward each Obsession.

5. Continue until Voices have spent all Willpower or the story reaches a natural end.

Why You Should Try Everyone Is John

Everyone Is John delivers riotous storytelling with minimal prep. It’s perfect for game nights when you want something light, unpredictable, and full of player-driven chaos. Because the rules are simple, the real focus falls squarely on creative narration and improvisation. New voices, bizarre obsessions, and unexpected skill uses keep every session fresh.

Tips for Memorable Sessions

• Encourage outlandish Obsessions, from tall tales lead to the best mishaps.

• Keep Willpower bids fast; long deliberations kill pacing.

• Embrace failure. When John messes up, it often spawns the funniest moments.

• Rotate Voice sheets between sessions for new combinations of skills and goals.

• Record the wildest outcomes to build a shared history and inside jokes.

Embrace the uproar, unleash your inner villain, and let the most devious Voice win. Everyone Is John isn’t just a game, it’s an exercise in collaborative mayhem that you and your friends won’t soon forget. Gather your dice, sharpen those obsessions, and get ready to control the most unremarkable man ever to terrorize your tabletop.


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